Strange thing happened yesterday.
It was Saturday morning and I was off to a karate lesson at American Martial Arts. I hadn’t eaten or had a cup of coffee yet – not sure what I was thinking because well, everyone knows you can’t kick ass on an empty stomach – or without having coffee first. It’s science.
I pulled into the drive thru at the coffee place and came out the other side, now armed with coffee – the cup locked and loaded in my cup holder, and a sandwich in my right hand. With my free hand, on the wheel, I turned the car onto the road and continued my drive, occasionally taking a bite.
Are your ready for this?
Sometimes, I’d set that delicious breakfast sandwich down on my lap, pick up my coffee and take a drink, and then set it back down again….only to pick the sandwich back up and take another bite. Whoah. Mind = Blown
This all happened while I careened perilously down a public road in a one-ton missile like a regular Evil Knievel – who just happened to trade in his motorcycle for a family friendly SUV. While I did all of those crazy thing, I even took a moment to pull up a That’s the Way I Heard It – Mike Rowe podcast on my iPhone.
I know, I know…I’m a total badass.
How will this all end, you ask?
Well, I didn’t kill anyone. I didn’t wreck my car. I didn’t even destroy or damage anyone’s property. No one even got scared or had their feelings hurt – to my knowledge, at least.
But what I did was illegal in the state of Washington.
I had that realization about halfway through my drive becoming suddenly paranoid that there might be a cop around me.
BECAUSE I WAS EATING FOOD. Illegally.
Sorry to disappoint. I didn’t get pulled over or get into an accident. I was just paranoid. About eating food illegally.
EATING FOOD ILLEGALLY.